How to Become Friends with Fairies in 5 Steps

5 simple ways to forge a friendship with the Fairies in your life - for real. 

by Sarah Petruno, Shamana

When my daughter was nearly 3 years old, our family moved cross country and into a new house in an urban neighborhood. Surrounded by houses on all sides in a densely populated area, we had a yard, but it didn’t feel quite as magical as when we were living in the woods of the Sierra Nevada Mountains.

I knew that the magic was missing because we had yet to invite and make acquaintance with the magic-creating fairies in the area. We hadn’t become friends with the local fairies, yet.

I’ve long been friends with and supporters of those in the fairy kingdom. I regularly express my gratitude for their presence in my life, and I try to make offerings when we go somewhere new.

But even if you have fairy friends in one place, this doesn’t mean that all fairies everywhere know that you are an ally and a friend. Just like all humans on the planet don’t suddenly know that you’re a super nice person as soon as you grace them with your presence.

In order to make new friends and be trusted, just about anywhere, you have to demonstrate that you’re a friendly and a trustworthy person.

You have to do this in the physical world, and also, in the spiritual world.

Manners apply in both places. So when you go somewhere new (or old), try not to forget your sense of manners, friendliness, and compassion when it comes to the Spirit world, too.

To become friends with fairies, you have to do the same things you would do if you wanted to make a friend in the human, physical world.

These are my must-dos to becoming friends with fairies.

5 simple ways to forge a friendship with the Fairies in your life - for real. 

How To Become Friends with Fairies

1. Make them feel comfortable and at home

If you were having guests over, you’d offer them something to drink, check to see if they were hot or too cold, if they had somewhere to sit, and if all their needs were met. If you want to be hospitable and friendly to the fairies in your area, consider what types of things fairies might like to have to feel accommodated. In some houses, this could mean fairy gardens, plants, and shiny things. Add to your house and yard the things that you think fairies would want to feel at home and comfortable in your (and their) space. If you want fairies to stay, make it feel like your home is their home - just like you would try to do for a human guest.

2. Give a gift

Let’s say you were having guests over for a party, you’d likely prepare some food and beverage items to share, as gifts from you to your guests. If you were going to someone else’s house for a gathering, you’d likely bring something as a gift. Gift exchange is the ultimate tradition in making friends and expressing love and appreciation.

To give a gift to your fairy friends, simply set aside whatever you wish to give in an area of your yard or home that can go untouched for 24 or so hours. You can give water, fruit, food items, crystals, shiny things, leaves, flowers, feathers, sticks, and really anything that you wish. All you have to do is set your offering aside and let the fairies know, either in writing, in thought, or in spoken word that your gift is for them. And then just leave it. When you return, your gift will likely still remain, and they may have even left you something in return! Look around and keep your eyes peeled over the next few days for any new and fun items that have appeared near your offering site.

3. Try not to set expectations

This one mostly has to do with appearances and behaviors. To be a supportive and compassionate friend to your human counterparts, you’d likely try to avoid setting expectations on your friends to look or act a certain way. Of course, you’d keep company with only those who respected and held shared values to you, but you would probably try to refrain judging or setting preconceived notions of the physical attributes your friends must have or the things they could and could not do, with limits.

While some fairies look and act like Disney fairies, not all do. If this is what you expect, you may have a harder time seeing, feeling, or connecting with the fairies in your area that wish to connect with you. To expand your ideas of what it could mean to be a fairy, do some research on the different types and appearances of fairies so that you have an idea of the full range of fairies you can expect to meet.

4. Show interest in their presence

Once you’ve made your fairy friends feel comfortable with a fairy house or some plants, for example, try not to completely forget their existence. Imagine if you had guests over, and after making sure everyone had drinks and seats, you completely left the room, never to return. Awkward, right? Your guests would probably feel unwelcome and leave.

Same with your fairy friends. Continue to check in on them, provide new comforts, wonder about how they’re doing, and talk to them. To keep a friendship, you have to maintain it.

5. Display happiness in your space

The same goes for how happy you seem to be when your guests and friends are around. If human guests came to your house, and each time they came over, you didn’t seem happy and instead, you seemed downright cranky in their presence, they might start to wonder if they were the cause. Friends are there to support you in times of sadness, anger, and unhappiness, but if you want them to stick around, you might have to give a little back, too, so they feel appreciated and valued. Even if you are going through a difficult time and happiness is hard for you, remember to express your gratitude for their presence, and smile a little when they’re around, too.

Making friends is making friends, it doesn’t matter if you’re human or fairy. The fairy friend making process is probably even easier, too! You don’t have to worry about unrequited attempts or unequal relationships with fairies - there’s no judgment in the eyes of fairies. You can’t go wrong, I promise.

With love,


LAST UPDATED: December 11, 2015

Disclaimer: By law, we are required to state that we are not a medical doctors, the information presented here is for education purposes only, and our advice is not meant to be replaced for medical diagnosis and/or treatment by your doctor. This website is run by a shaman and an herbalist. The statements made on this blog and website represent our view of the world given our unique set of life experiences. These are truths as we see and understand the world at the time the words were written. Statements here have not been evaluated by the FDA and are meant for educational purposes only. We cannot guarantee successful outcomes. Your health is your responsibility. Please view our full terms & conditions and site disclaimers, located in the webpage footer.

Subscribe to my list & get a FREE GIFT