How to Start Finding Your Power After Power Loss {Post 2/5}

How to Start Finding Your Power After Power Loss {Post 2/5}

{This is part 2 of 5 of a post series on Power Loss, where we'll talk about what it is and how to retrieve power. Find all posts with the label “power loss.” This used to be an eCourse that I'm posting on the blog for freeeeeeeee. Enjoy!}

POST 1What Power Loss Is and Why It Matters

Oh hey, welcome back to the power loss blog series!

In the previous post, you were asked to start contemplating and considering areas of your life where you have experienced power loss.

If you haven't done that, stop. Stop reading this post, go back to the last post, and think about AND write down areas of your life where you've given power away. It doesn't need to be super specific just yet, because that's what we're doing today. You just need to write down like 1-3 word phrases like, "my daughter's birth," or "at work," or whatever.

Today, we’re going to dig deep and really start to identify those areas of power loss.

The purpose of this series is to help you reclaim your personal power.

The only way to get your power back is to go back in time and find out where it was lost, and bring it back. That's the shamanic way of doing it. So, we have to know where exactly and specifically you lost your power. 

Imagine this series was called “How to start finding that red sweater you lost” instead.

The first step in finding the lost sweater, would be to try to remember where you left it or who took it, right?

So, to get your power back, the first step is remembering the events in which your power was given away (or taken, depending on the circumstances)

You can get pretty far back with this, and how far you want to go depends on how you feel. 

You can go all the way back to your childhood up until now, you can even consider other lifetimes.

But it's time to ask yourself, specifically, what are all the events that you can remember in which you have felt like you lost control or power over a situation?

What have you given outside control of your life to? Where and in which specific areas of your life have you relinquished power?

Take a few days to think about it if you need to. But you need to. That is key. You need to identify where and to whom/what you've given power.

Think of EXTERNAL influences to your current challenges. Have you given them power, and if so, how much?

So that brings us to today's exercise in reclaiming your power: 
Create a List.

Begin by getting out a piece of paper and something to write with. Or using the notes app on your phone.

At the top of the page, write, “Areas of my life where I've given power away." Yes, it might seem harsh. Do it anyway. You're taking personal responsibility in co-creating these experiences. Whether or not you meant to doesn't matter, remember.

Carry this sheet with you and throughout the day today (or have the notes app open), and think of specific or ongoing events and areas in your life where:
  • you have accidentally or unknowingly given away power
  • you've had it taken from you by a parent, partner, boss or stranger.
  • you have been in a situation in which you were victimized
  • you have a situation where a power loss is currently ongoing
  • All the way back to childhood until now, consider everything. 

Think of a time when you have been scolded for doing something you thought was right, and then, you felt bad for it. This is a time when your emotional power has been lost to another person. They now have power over how you feel.

Think of how you manage your own health, who makes the decisions about what’s best for you, and where the balance of power resides there. Are decisions regarding your health in your court or are they with another person?

Consider a life trauma you’ve experienced in which another person was the perpetrator of the trauma. Think about how this trauma has been processed and how their power was assigned over your life in this situation.

Jot down all instances of power loss, these and others like these, that you have experienced throughout your life. 

Write down as many details as you remember and how the power was lost. 

This can be as cathartic and as healing as taking the power back itself, so journal it out if you need to and take your time. 

Acknowledging power loss is a healing step in the process of reclaiming yourself. 


19 Signs of Soul Loss

19 Signs of Soul Loss

Originally posted September 2015, this blog has been updated from the original.

Yesterday, we talked about soul loss and retrieval and you might be thinking you need a soul retrieval, but how can you tell?

It's a bit tricky because each person's experience will differ depending on what part of themselves has been lost, but there are some overarching cues that some will experience.

As a reminder, when we are born, we are born into our body alongside our soul.

Our soul is essentially our personal blueprint and the collection of things that makes us who we are, emotionally, spiritually, experientially.

The soul is made of many layers. Each layer is an aspect of ourselves, and each aspect comes together to form our entire soul - to form who we are as a person right now.

When you experience trauma, hardship, heartache, and life challenges, aspects of you can become lost along the way. This is called soul loss and happens when parts of ourselves fragment off, dissociate, and stay with the trauma and hardship until we can come back and fully process it. (Sometimes soul fragments are taken, as well).

When we experience loss, we can feel lost.

We can lose parts of our soul-self as we go through life, and there are parts that we have lost in other lifetimes.

These parts can take up considerable chunks of our energy, our personality, our drive.

We can lose the parts of us that allow us to feel worthy, to feel valuable, and to feel motivated. We can lose our ability to trust others, to feel pleasure, to experience creativity, and we can even lose our sense of direction and our soul purpose.

We can also lose parts of our energy, when soul fragments separate, that are responsible for optimal physical functions, too. Soul loss can affect, energetically and spiritually, our emotional body, our spiritual body, and our physical body.

Soul loss is a condition of the human soul wherein the symptoms can be life-altering. From depression, apathy, and anxiety to physical illnesses, soul loss can have a real effect on your life. Soul loss can affect every area of your life.

Think this sounds like you?

19 Signs You Have Experienced Soul Loss

1. You have suffered abuse

2. You have been experiencing recurring traumatic dreams

3. You have experienced the loss of a child, at any stage

4. A role model or person close to you has died

5. You feel a lack of excitement towards the things you used to enjoy

6. You have a lack of confidence and self-worth - feeling like you have nothing of value to offer

7. You second guess yourself, questioning both your decisions and intelligence

8. You frequently feel waves of worthlessness

9.  You've noticed a lack of desire or motivation to pursue wants, hopes, and dreams

10. You have a tendency to looks towards others for approval and support

11. You are often apathetic and feel hopeless

12. You are caught in a pattern or have a blockage and you've tried many things to overcome it, and can't seem to see a way out

13. You often feel like your life has no clear direction or purpose

14. You feel like gifts that you once had have been lost (i.e. creativity)

15. You frequently feel lost, spacey, dissociated, not present in your body, out of it, or in a state of vertigo

16. You have been or were poor, lived in a scarcity mentality 

17. You had a traumatic childbirth experience 

18. You've experienced a trauma that you know you have not processed or fully dealt with

19. You keep making self-destructive designs despite wanting to stop

If any of these sound familiar to you, it’s very likely that you have experienced soul loss. (Pretty much everyone has, unless you're an embodied angel or ascended master, and maybe even then..)

Most people have experienced at least 3-4 soul loss events in their lives, and even more are likely if you’ve had an especially difficult life experience. I've worked with people who have retrieved 100+ soul fragments.

But, in a single sitting, most people can easily have returned to them 3-4 soul fragments. My experience working with others is that most can retrieve 1-6 at a time, even if there are others that need to be retrieved later on.

The solution to soul loss is having a soul retrieval done. You can read more about soul retrieval here, and if you'd like to have one done, you can try it yourself via a guided journey meditation in my Etsy shop, or book a session with me or your preferred shamanic practitioner.



What is Soul Retrieval? (And How it Works)

What is a Soul Retrieval? (And How it Works)

Originally written in July 2014 - this post has been revised and updated from the original.


To talk about soul retrieval, we have to first talk about soul loss. And to talk about soul loss, we have to first understand that we are more than just our physical body.

Any individual on this earth that exists in the physical space - a person, an animal, or a plant, for example - we are basically spirits wearing physical bodies for the time being.

You already know, at least intellectually, that it is not your physical body that makes you you. It’s the essence of you. It’s your soul. It’s your spirit. Who you are, as an individual, is not defined by your dress size, the clarity of your skin, or the style of your hair.

For the purposes of this article, we'll be talking about the soul, and soul and spirit are often used interchangeably. In my practice, I understand the difference to be that the soul is the physically embodied part of the spirit that can return to spirit in the afterlife. Both makeup who you are, but the soul is the part that is with you, in the physical, right now.

Your soul is made up of two other, interweaving and interconnecting bodies - the energetic body, and the spiritual body. There’s no separation between the two; I like to think of them as layers of yourself. Your thoughts, your feelings, your perceptions, your viewpoints, your uniqueness, your soul history, your life history, all that makes up the essence of you is your soul. All the lessons you have learned and are learning in this lifetime and those past and present, and stored here. And each and every one of these lessons, these feelings, these emotions, these experiences have an energetic vibration. The sum of which comprises your energetic body.

Each microscopic part of you, physical or spiritual, has an energetic vibration, and all together, these tiny pieces make up your soul's energy.

Experiences, thoughts, emotions, feelings, lessons, viewpoints, perspectives make up both your spiritual body and your energetic body, combining to form your soul.

You following me?

Your soul is made up of energy. That energy makes up who you are.
I find it helps to categorize it. Though it's quite a bit more black and white than it actually is, for our human brain and experience, I break it down into 3 primary bodies:

Our physical body - Arms, legs, organs, eyes, ears, organs and skin.

Our energetic body - chakras, aura, and energetic vibrations carried by all experiences, thoughts, feelings, and physical bodily functions

Our spiritual body - Thoughts, feelings, emotions, life lessons, experiences, personality traits, and perspectives

All three of these are interwoven and act like layers of one unified body.

I repeat, there is no separation.
However, when someone dies, they leave their physical body and keep the other two. This is the soul, and that soul goes back to Spirit.

Shamanic healing focus on the energetic and spiritual body, the part of you that is transcendent and goes with you through this lifetime and other lifetimes.
So what does this have to do with soul loss?
Stay with me here.

Your soul, and thus, your energy, acts kind of like millions of tiny puzzle pieces all coming together to form who you are.

Everything about who you are, your experiences, perspectives, thoughts, emotions, feelings, both in your current life and previous lifetimes, all come together to form your unique soul and your unique energy.

We are a sum of energetic and spiritual parts - all coming together from this lifetime and others to make up who we are and how we see the world.

Each of these pieces, each of these experiences, each of these thoughts, feelings, and emotions, each of these events, each little bit and piece along the way are the pieces that comprise our soul.

These pieces are soul fragments.

Have you ever heard the phrase, “I think a little bit of my Soul died in X, Y, Z interaction.” Or “I think so and so took a little bit of my Soul with them.”?

Phrases like these have an actual energetic basis.

When you feel as though a piece of your soul is missing or you’ve left a piece of your soul behind, energetically, chances are, this has actually happened and shamanically it is known as soul loss.

Typically, in most cases, what happens is that you experience a trauma and for whatever reason, age, life circumstance, depth of trauma, you are unable to fully process it. That part of your soul, the age and point in your life you were in when you experienced it, can separate from your soul now and stay there. Still in the trauma. Just waiting for you to come back and process it.

It can be likened to dissociation, psychologically.

In a lot of people, it's a self-protective mechanism so that you can go on living your life and survive, and not spiral into trauma when you need to do other things to keep yourself alive (like, work a job, feed your family, etc.).

When can soul loss occur?

More often than you think! It does not have to be a big giant trauma you experience.

It can occur at any time and in any life, past or present, in which your soul, you, experienced a traumatic event or series of events of any kind.

Any event that is or was emotionally, physically or mentally difficult, heart wrenching, or traumatic is an event in which a soul fragment could of been lost or separated from you. In this life and in all past lives.

Areas in which soul fragment loss often occurs include (non-exclusively):
  • Poverty
  • Power loss (more on this later)
  • Sexual or physical assault
  • Pregnancy and child loss including miscarriage and abortion 
  • Physical, emotional or sexual abuse
  • Bullying, teasing and mistreatment
  • Romantic or platonic relationships that end poorly
  • Death or loss of a loved one
  • Growing up too fast
  • Shifts in life that happened quickly

This list just names a few possible reasons for soul loss, but not all.

These soul pieces, big and small, make up who you are, and during traumatic events, parts of you, certain aspects of yourself (such as your dignity, for example, your confidence, your feelings of security in your sexuality, your emotional wellbeing, your trust towards others, anything at all) can go MIA. It's not just emotional, either. Remember that parts of your soul also make up parts of your energy body and are connected to your physical body. 

If a part of your energy goes missing, this can cause problems in the physical, as well. 

A part of your soul can separate from the greater part of your soul right now, and this is what's called soul loss. 

One person can have tens or hundreds or even thousands of lost soul fragments, from various experiences, across their lifetime. 

Unless you're a spiritually ascended master, you almost definitely have some soul fragments that need to be retrieved. 

And that's what soul retrieval is, the shamanic practice of finding these lost soul fragments. 


You get it now, right?

Soul Retrieval

Alright, so a Soul Retrieval is the practice of finding those soul fragments, calling them back and reintegrating them with your soul energy now. 

Typically, this is done within a shamanic journey, which is a meditative state in which you, or a shamanic practitioner, journeys in time and space to where that soul fragment is, calls them back, and energetically and spiritually reconnects them and reintegrates them with you now.

How do you do it? 

It can be kinda complicated. If you have some meditation experience, you can try it yourself. If not, I recommend you work with a shamanic practitioner to help you. I also have a meditation in my Etsy shop that guides you through the process and lots of people have had success with it!

I don't want to say it's impossible to do on your own and that a novice should never do it alone because that's me taking your power away. 

If you feel confident, try it. But if not, asking for help is okay!

Here's the general process: 

1. Know in your heart that part of you is missing and that you're ready and willing to call this part of you back

2. Get into a meditative state, (diffusing frankincense helps, like, a lot!!) call in your angels and guides, ground and clear your energy, visualize a safe and protected journey space, and ask your guides to so you where this part of you is located

3. Ask them to lead you to that place, and follow them

4. Once there, notice your surroundings and take in information about your age, the event, and the details

5. Approach the part of yourself stuck there and tell them who you are, what year it is, and what is happening 

6. Ask them, convince them, to come back with you and address their concerns

7. Together, journey back. Cutting cords from the energy, calling back energy from it, and clearing it on a soul level. Clear the energy of the soul fragment before you bring them back to the present. (this is the tricky part!)

8. Ask your soul fragment what you can do that would make them feel welcome and at home (the welcoming ceremony). Agree to do that. 

9. Back in current time and space, with their energy clear, clear your own energy if you have not already. You may also wish to clear it again to clear anything you've picked up in the journey.

10. Integrate the soul fragment. Ask them to step back in and reconnect and reintegrate with your energy. Ask your guides to help with the reintegrate and blending of energy.

11.  REST and perform the welcoming ceremony that you agreed to do!


This a very rough guideline. Each and every soul retrieval is different, will behave differently, and will have different requirements.

But, that's pretty much it! Soul loss and soul retrieval in a nutshell. (Read more about signs of soul loss here.)

Trust your intuition and comfort level, and you can always lean on help if needed. My Etsy shop has a meditation that guides you through the process and we can also work together in a healing session.

When a soul retrieval is done, usually you feel really tired for the next few days. Healing can take days, to weeks, to months, and this is considered spiritual and energetic surgery. Many emotions can surface as you going through the healing process as well, but in the end, most feel more whole afterward, and that's the whole point!